When the first season of Emily in Paris premiered in October 2020, it quickly became one of Netflix’s most-watched shows, ranking in the top 10 and drawing more than 58 million viewers across 90 countries. Thanks to this success, Netflix extended the show to four seasons, with the next one scheduled for production in 2025. The series became an internet phenomenon, earning multiple Emmy and Golden Globe nominations, including Best Comedy Series.
However, as we follow Emily’s adventures in Paris, there’s a strange sense of dissonance. Stylishly dressed and self-assured, she becomes the object of romantic interest for many men, but each of her steps in relationships raises questions that the show never fully answers. Why, despite her obvious attractiveness and remarkable intellect, does Emily so easily drift from one affair to another? What is the essence and the problem behind Emily’s character?
Photo: Netflix
From Sex and the City to Sex in Paris
It’s important to note that the show was created by Darren Star, the mastermind behind Sex and the City, and this cannot be overlooked. Both series propagate the same approach to life: sex, relationships, and attachments are reduced to mere entertainment that requires no deep emotional engagement. Star’s conscious writing choice leans toward depicting sexually liberated women who enter relationships easily without necessarily forming emotional attachments. This is part of his authorial style—glamorous, carefree American freedom, where sex is equated with an after-work cocktail (if you’re still into alcohol, which is not necessarily in line with the latest societal trends). However, this image often masks deeper issues that the show doesn’t explore.
At the core of the plot lies Emily’s romance with Gabriel. This relationship is a kind of quintessence of “drawn-out chemistry” set against the glossy backdrop of Paris. They are drawn to each other from the first moment, yet the series cleverly plays with the theme of forbidden love. He’s a charismatic chef, and she’s an American lost in the labyrinth of French life and emotions. Instead of a serious romance, the viewer is presented with an emotional duel, where eternal unspoken words dominate the relationship, stretching the plot across several seasons, with beautiful shots and fashionable outfits. And if Paris is the city of love, for this couple, it becomes a city of uncomfortable feelings and untimely confessions.
In her relationships with other men, Emily faces internal contradictions. Having decided that Gabriel should be with someone else, she prefers not to take decisive steps and seeks solace in a relationship with Alfie— a British man who can offer stability. It’s important to note that her relationship with Alfie is a textbook example of the “safe” kind of connections often depicted in such series. Emily and Alfie—“We are just passing time”—what does that mean?
This phrase reflects emotional detachment. For Emily, it is a form of self-protection because she is still emotionally attached to Gabriel. While she appears to be in a relationship with Alfie, she refuses to dive deep into it, although she seems positive, friendly, and engaged. But how mature is such an emotional approach? These light connections are actually a cover for unresolved pain and confusion. Why didn’t Emily wait for Gabriel to sort out his chaos? Why did she immediately jump into another relationship without giving herself or him the time to figure out their feelings and the realities of their lives? This speaks to inner immaturity and impulsiveness, masquerading as “liberation.” It seems that, in reality, she can’t stay alone, emotionally dependent on Gabriel, and refuses to take a pause because she’s afraid to face herself—the emptiness, pain, and insecurity. The script doesn’t discuss any of this because it belongs to the genre of light romantic comedy. But in reality, such dynamics are painful and destructive.
The pain from such relationships exists, but it’s suppressed, and the numerous entanglements are seen as painkillers. But a painkiller has only a temporary effect, and it doesn’t address the deeper symptoms—such as the fear of loneliness, unresolved feelings, constant seeking for validation, or simply living by inertia.
The script doesn’t show any of this. Despite the TV format, which seems to provide time for deeper reflection, the storyline remains light in genre, and the people and their relationships remain completely disengaged, as if shouting: “We’re just passing time.” The show superficially skirts the emotional consequences of such relationships, resembling the modern world dominated by surface-level social media, where people only seek entertainment. Life has become overly simplified for the sake of gloss, and the audience in search of depth, attachment, and honesty will find nothing but vacuous imagery. It’s as if the world is depicted as an extended commercial shouting, “Buy this… buy what you don’t need, because we’ll prove you can’t live without it.”
What We Lose in the Pursuit of Ease
Emily in Paris is not only a project created for spectacle and entertainment but also a product of its time, reflecting the values of glamour and ease that are embodied in its protagonist.
In modern television, there’s often a confusion between liberation and irresponsibility. True liberation is when you are free to make choices, knowing the consequences, and are emotionally mature, with internal boundaries and respect for both yourself and others. But in these shows, liberation is portrayed as sleeping with anyone, anytime, without asking questions, and being able to walk away unscathed even if you hurt others.
This is not freedom—it’s infantilism dressed up in glamour. Sex is not just physiology; it’s psycho-emotional intimacy. Through sex, trauma, attachments, and dependencies are transmitted. It’s an irreversible exchange of energy, even if some try to deny it. And ultimately, it leads to illness, vulnerability, and consequences. When everything is simplified to “flirting on the first date” and “sleeping together on the third,” people are led to believe that this is the social norm. Then they wonder why they feel empty inside and why it’s difficult to build stable, trusting relationships.
Television series form new “values” and a dating culture where expectations quickly shift to the physical, attachments remain superficial, and people burn bridges because it’s easier. Depth is seen as too difficult and old-fashioned. In the end, many of us feel lost. We experience fatigue, emptiness, and loneliness. Mindfulness is labeled as conservatism, but respect for yourself, your body, and your feelings is neither old-fashioned nor conservative.
